29.02.2024

Why do people get divorced so often? Divorce after many years of marriage Divorce after 10 years of marriage.


Starting a family is a very important step that affects the future fate of two people. Very often, marriages are concluded during a period of falling in love, when feelings cloud common sense. However, some time passes, and people who were once madly in love move away from each other, begin to notice shortcomings, and become irritated over any trifle. As a result, the couple decide to divorce so as not to ruin each other’s lives. Sometimes this happens by mutual consent, and sometimes unilaterally. In any case, divorce does not promise anything pleasant.

The inability to compromise also very often leads to discord in family life. Source: Flickr (gurbir.grewal)

Why do people get divorced?

Statistics show that the number of divorces has increased significantly over the past 10 years. Divorces are more often initiated by women than men. And this is understandable, because representatives of the fair sex are more susceptible to emotions.

Interesting fact! Today, 57% of families dissolve their marriage for various reasons. That is, every third married couple is already divorced or is on the verge of family collapse.

What could this be connected with and why are there so many divorces? The fact is that the modern pace of life tires a person very much, and home problems and everyday needs only add additional stress. That is why spouses try to protect themselves from unnecessary worries by resorting to divorce. Also, cases of too early marriages have become more frequent, when young people at a young age, based only on mutual feelings, create a unit of society. Naturally, after some time, passions subside, and disappointment sets in, accompanied by divorce proceedings. And these are not all the reasons for divorce. Psychologists agree that some people are at risk because their behavior patterns and outlook on life can provoke divorce.

Who is at risk?

The optimal age for starting a family is considered to be from 22 to 30 years. During this period, the personality has already been formed, received an education, socially adapted and is ready for the next step. As a rule, at this age people have some goals in life, as well as a conscious desire to start a family and continue the family line, which cannot be said about young people aged 17-20 years.

Marriages that are too late, that is, after 30-40 years, also fall into the risk group. At this age, men and women are self-sufficient and mature individuals. It is difficult for them to show flexibility and loyalty towards another person, which are necessary for normal relationships in the family. Some people are not mentally ready to change their usual way of life: to sacrifice something, make concessions and be with their partner too often. The inability to compromise also very often leads to discord in family life.

Professional dedication and excessive workaholism are also very often reasons for divorce. If a spouse devotes 12 hours a day to work, forgetting about the other half and children, then quarrels and misunderstandings arise in the family. Chronic fatigue is accompanied by irritability or prolonged depression, which will inevitably lead to the dissolution of marriage. Therefore, many careerists believe that family is an obstacle to achieving professional heights and self-realization.

Note! In the first 10 years, about 60% of married couples divorce, then the trend decreases. The most difficult period of family formation is the first 3 years and the birth of the first child. If the difficult stage is passed, then, as a rule, the marriage bonds are strengthened, and mutual respect and understanding begins.

Arranged marriages also lead to complete disappointment. Recently, it is not uncommon to see a respectable man over fifty with a young and beautiful wife. The danger of arranged marriages is that when a person is fed up with money and entertainment, he wants emotional satisfaction in the form of love and respect, but it is not always possible to receive sincere feelings.

Sociological surveys have made it possible to understand and organize the main reasons for divorce of young and mature married couples.

One of the common reasons for divorce after 30 years of marriage is infidelity. Source: Flickr (Massimo_Cerrato)

The main causes of divorce in the family

The reasons given by spouses for divorce do not always correspond to reality, since sometimes the separation is not entirely peaceful. It’s not for nothing that people have a proverb: “From love to hate there is one step.” It is most difficult for those who have a child together. Children suffer enormous psychological trauma due to their parents' divorce, although they do not always show it. What factors become an insurmountable obstacle to a family idyll?

  • Psychological unpreparedness for marriage in 42% of cases causes the dissolution of family ties. This means that spouses, due to age or personal beliefs, do not respect each other, do not make concessions and do not support each other. This happens when feelings become dull, and common interests have not emerged during their time together.
  • Alcoholism and other addictions are in second place (23%-31%). Such a high percentage of marriage dissolution is due to the fact that constant stress at work, low wages and the inability to self-realize push people to abuse alcohol and drugs. A person believes that he is distracted from all pressing problems, and life gets better on its own. In reality, this does not happen, and family life turns into a nightmare.
  • Adultery is the third reason why a husband and wife separate forever. Lack of attention, monotony in sexual life and unstable relationships lead to the fact that one of the spouses begins to seek solace on the side. Some families turn a blind eye to outright infidelity, while others cannot live with a person who is capable of such an act. One of the common reasons for divorce after 30 years of marriage is infidelity. At a more mature age, husbands cheat more often, since the appearance of the woman with whom he linked his destiny changes somewhat for the worse, and there is no longer any need to raise children. A self-sufficient man seeks new sensations, the hunter's instinct awakens. Although women also often cheat on their husbands due to lack of attention and sexual dissatisfaction.
  • Lack of mutual assistance in everyday life. Reluctance to help your spouse in solving everyday problems results in constant discontent and quarrels. In most cases, women do not put up with this state of affairs and file for divorce.
  • Financial difficulties. Some couples, when falling in love, do not think about how they will support their family and manage a budget. A chronic lack of funds for a full-fledged existence leads to internal dissatisfaction and isolation. Without sufficient finances, a young family cannot afford basic things: going to the movies, going on vacation, purchasing the things they want. Long-term financial difficulties alienate lovers from each other.
  • Excessive jealousy is not such a rare case as it might seem at first glance. Too jealous people limit their partner, depriving him of personal space. Total control can develop into paranoia, accompanied by uncontrollable anger. It is difficult to build normal family relationships with such a person.
  • Sexual dissatisfaction of partners. When love passions pass and everyday life begins, spouses often lose interest in each other. An intimate relationship becomes monotonous and does not cause much delight. This is especially true after the birth of a child. The woman is busy raising and caring for the baby, so there is practically no strength or desire for intimacy.
  • Lack of children is a modern problem. Every 3 married couples suffer from infertility, which is why doctors recommend immediately contacting specialists to solve the problem, rather than filing a divorce petition. Naturally, all sensible young people want to have children, but a disappointing diagnosis becomes a stumbling block for many couples in love.
  • Moral oppression is a way for some people to fulfill themselves and feed their ego. At work, they cannot express their opinions or express dissatisfaction, so they bring all the negativity home, taking out their anger on their household. Constant reproaches and insults from a spouse lead to complete disappointment and hatred. Naturally, such relationships lead to divorce proceedings.
  • Physical violence. Unbalanced spouses are not able to control their emotions and give up at the slightest quarrel. Inappropriate behavior and physical violence also contribute to the breakdown of family ties. The reasons for divorcing her husband in this case are obvious.
  • Different views on life are a rare problem, but it occurs for those who consider themselves a self-sufficient person. Constant disagreement with the opinion of a loved one, opposing views on family values, raising children and other everyday and social problems lead to scandals.

Maintaining a warm and tender relationship in marriage is a lot of work! Two completely different people connect their lives to create their own little world, understandable only to them. Do not ignore the requests of loved ones, value your family and support each other. Love is always built on mutual understanding, respect and wisdom.

Video on the topic

It is customary for the husband to be the protector and the stone wall, the owner and protector, and the wife to cook the borscht and meet her husband at the door. And people follow invented stereotypes, even if they don’t like it. They believe that this is what a real family should look like, and there is no other way. Sooner or later, your eyes stop shining with love, and you no longer want to force yourself to be strong and make decisions. I want to be happy, but there are no instructions on how to do it. And without instructions, all that remains is divorce. Usually psychologists advise not to jump too quickly and try to save the marriage. This is wonderful, but only if the cause of the discord is really just a misunderstanding, or outside influence. But, if people are initially different and this marriage is a complete misunderstanding, you should not hold on to it and suffer. Divorce can be a step towards a new, happy life for both spouses, but with different partners.

Interesting statistics on marriages and divorces in Russia

But divorce statistics for 5 years, including 2016, show that the number of divorced families remains almost unchanged, which cannot be said about the number of officially registered marriages - there are fewer of them. Divorce statistics in Moscow over the past year show a decrease in their number compared to the previous year. However, the number of applications for marriage registration has also decreased.
In St. Petersburg, too, similar dynamics are observed as in Moscow. Divorce statistics by year show that the lower the number of registrations, the less often divorce occurs. Divorce and children What are the statistics on divorce after the birth of a child? For many couples, no matter how many years they have been married, the birth of their first child leaves an imprint on the relationship between the spouses.


The main reason is psychological unpreparedness for drastic changes, as the usual schedule of living together is disrupted.

9 facts about divorce that every couple planning a wedding should know

Therefore, do not try to spend your annual budget on a banquet, do not try to surprise the audience with something or defeat your former rival. It’s better to spend this money on a romantic honeymoon or save it in reserve. According to sociologists, excessive extravagance shows that spouses are likely to be unable to manage their finances properly.

And on this basis they will have disagreements. But a large number of invited guests, on the contrary, potentially indicates the strength of the relationship. Divorce affects heart health Recent studies show that women who have gone through a divorce are more likely to suffer from heart attacks. This information will be important for men who care about the health of their significant other.


For women who have been through divorce proceedings two or more times, the risk of developing cardiovascular disease increases by 77 percent.

Statistical table of divorces in Russia in different years

Info

The age group is from 20 to 25 years, i.e. girls born between 1900 and 1995 make up 40% of all marriages. Girls from 26 to 30 years old – 27%. And the group of 30–35 years old accounts for only 12% of the total number of marriages. The overwhelming majority of unions are concluded by men and women whose ages range from 20 to 35 years.

This trend appeared relatively recently. In Russia, before the 90s, it was customary to enter into an alliance at a younger age. However, values ​​have changed, the lines between the sexes have blurred, women have become emancipated, and age has also ceased to matter much. Marriage unions began to be concluded after 25 years. At this time, both spouses have education, social status and a mature worldview.
But early marriages also occur. They are the ones who very often fall into the 16% barrier of divorced people who have not been married for even 2 years.

Why do people get divorced after 10 years of marriage?

Attention

Content:

  • Why does a relationship break down?
  • Russian divorces
  • How long does marriage last in Russia?
  • Number of divorces by region
  • Divorce and children
  • Behavior of spouses after divorce
  • Divorces for 2016–2017 in Ukraine and Belarus

Just a couple of centuries ago, the official divorce of a marriage was considered almost the biggest shame in life. Today this process has become the norm for society. Divorce statistics directly indicate this. More detailed statistics on divorces in percentage can be seen in the table: Country Number of divorces in percentage Portugal 67 Netherlands Germany Norway 48 Finland 45 America 53 Russia about 51 Belarus 45 Ukraine Moldova 42 Kazakhstan 27 Uzbekistan 8 Tajikistan 6 As you can see, almost every second married couple gets divorced.

How to decide to divorce after 10 years of marriage?

In many countries around the world, divorce statistics are constantly growing. For example, in Russia approximately half of marriages will break up. Even if newlyweds make a vow to be with each other “until death do them part,” there is a 50 percent chance that they will break it.
Having studied divorce statistics in detail, sociologists have come to some interesting conclusions. What to do to avoid ending up on the “dark side”? Get married closer to 30. Newlyweds who make informed choices have a greater chance of building a strong family. According to statistics, the least number of divorces are registered if people got married closer to their thirtieth birthday.
If the newlyweds are under twenty, then they are first in line for a potential breakup. Psychologists explain it this way: a strong desire to get married cannot be the key to a healthy relationship.

Divorce after many years of marriage: 10 most common reasons

After an unsuccessful marriage, only 27% of the fairer sex remarry. According to official divorce statistics, 15% of women in such unions do not re-apply for divorce. For divorced men, the numbers are significantly different. Only 68% remarry.
Among them, 73% find family happiness. It is worth noting that the divorce process has a negative impact on the health of the participants. In this case, men are more susceptible to the occurrence of diseases than women. For example, divorce is one of the main causes of myocardial infarction. Do wives return to their ex-husbands after a breakup? Not all spouses understand that in order for them to get back together, they both need to analyze what happened, draw adequate conclusions and try to change something in themselves. If only one of the spouses does this, then everything will end like the first time.

Statistics of marriages and divorces over the past 5 years in Russia

And again, of course, I advise you to think about whether the situation is so serious that you can’t do without a divorce? Maybe everything can still be fixed? This is a complex question and cannot be answered by someone from the outside; a couple must understand this. My friend's sister got divorced after 10 years of marriage, it was a very difficult decision for both of them. They were a wonderful couple, they lived very well, in prosperity and love, and had everything except children.

Gradually, every year this problem grew like a snowball and they could not solve it. Divorced. Now she is expecting a child from someone else, and he drinks. The reasons are different, but I know one thing, be that as it may, but if people don’t love each other or can’t anymore, then it’s better to separate, why torture each other? Divorce is stressful! “...Parting is a small death...” No matter how long you live with a person (a year, three, ten), it is difficult in any case.

Is there life after 10 years of marriage?

The main reason is that many couples do not want to register their union and live in a civil marriage. Such cohabitation can last for a long time, but without children. With the arrival of the baby, most parents decide to legalize their relationship. An analysis of divorce statistics in Russia shows that such families are much less likely to apply for divorce. However, not all couples are given a divorce. If the spouse is pregnant, then there can be no talk of any dissolution of the marriage. When a child is born, the father is required to stay with him for up to one year. If the situation has not changed during this time, then the spouses will be divorced without the consent of the wife. Divorce statistics in Russia by year indicate that over the past 50 years, broken unions in relation to marriages have not differed much in terms of numbers.

Why relationships break down Statistics on family divorce indicate the following reasons:

  • approximately 42% of couples separated due to unpreparedness for family life (psychologically or physically). During the dates, it seemed that this would always be the case, and the union registered at the registry office would only strengthen the relationship. However, after marriage, an understanding comes of how different the spouses are.

    Each of them requires constant attention to itself. While reciprocity is practically absent, which leads to systemic conflicts;

  • 31% of women and 23% of men say that their partner’s alcohol or drug addiction led to divorce;
  • 15% of wives and 12% of husbands demand a divorce due to the infidelity of their other half;
  • 9% of women file for divorce because their partners do not help them with household chores.

Divorce rate after 10 years of marriage

For example, the problem of alcoholism is only getting worse in the country. Therefore, the percentage of broken families for this reason is growing. There are also statistics on the reasons that spouses themselves indicate when filing for divorce.

  • Approximately 25% indicate infidelity;
  • 15% of divorced couples report sexual dissatisfaction with their partner;
  • About 13% cite personality incompatibility;
  • 7% indicate alcohol dependence.

The fact of the birth of a child changes the attitude of the spouses. Not all couples can survive the first months of sleep deprivation. Nervousness and irritation appear. Therefore, the birth of a child can both unite a family and destroy it. But there are couples who can live in the same territory, but not be a full-fledged family. Sometimes spouses even start parallel families.
There are many options for how an offended husband can react to his wife’s earnings: He demands that she quit her job in order to again become the master of the situation. He can insult and humiliate his wife in some everyday situations. Drinking with friends and women is possible in order to drown out this pain. It’s not logical, but what can you do, offended men don’t always act logically. Lack of children. Again, a man does not feel complete if he does not have children. There were cases when husbands left their wives, who gave birth to girls, not boys. Fortunately, most men these days are not so obsessed with sons, and they don’t care what gender the child will be, but there must be one. Lack of understanding in the family. Sometimes couples marry out of great love, but very soon they realize that the love is gone, and nothing else connects them.

If we had known from the beginning how to behave correctly in the family.

Even more unions would be lifelong if each one was concluded thoughtfully and at a time when both partners are truly ready for such a relationship.

Main reasons

Who doesn’t have friends who make you cringe and spoil your mood for a long time?

When to your soulmate a pile of claims is accumulating(it is possible that they were even voiced and discussed together more than once, but did not bring the desired result), then communication with her even on neutral topics often provokes the same reaction.

As a result, divorce becomes the only way out to maintain a normal psyche and even prevent a crime.

Why do women get divorced?

Often, ladies hold on to the bonds of marriage until the last moment, fearing that they will end up in the status of a divorcee for a thousand and one personal reasons. What could be the last straw for initiating divorce proceedings:


In what cases are men the initiators of divorce?

Gentlemen are less emotional and endure everyday adversities more easily. Apparently, this is why divorces on male initiative account for 40% of all official cases of divorce.


The most common compelling arguments

Good reasons:

Why do they break up after decades of married life?

Why do people get divorced after 10-20 years of marriage?

What circumstances should I indicate when making an application to the court?

Not everyone during a divorce wants to demonstrate to the world that how dishonest the other half turned out to be.

But in the statement of claim for divorce, it is advisable to write about the motives, taking into account which the official authority should agree to dissolve the plaintiff’s marriage.

To avoid getting into family troubles and don't indulge in demagoguery, the following wording can be specified in the document:


It is not necessary to draw up a list of claims - during the hearing of the case in court, the plaintiff will be given the opportunity to voice everything that he considers necessary to make public.

Divorce is one of the most unpleasant things, which can happen in the life of any married adult. But even this milestone can become a turning point in everyone’s fate if both ex-spouses draw the right conclusions from such an unpleasant experience.

Why are there so many divorces? Why do people get divorced and how to avoid it? Popular Psychology:


However, according to statistics, wives return after a divorce much less often. An analysis of the number of divorces in Russia according to statistics shows that a family can break up even after 29 years of marriage. Divorces for 2016–2017 in Ukraine and Belarus Divorce statistics in Ukraine are not reassuring. Approximately 62% of couples separate after being together for a maximum of 18 months. The reason for fleeting marriages is their conclusion at an early age. Young spouses who are not ready to start a new life often do not understand that the candy-bouquet period will not last forever. Therefore, when faced with the first difficulties, they regret taking a hasty step. It was also noted that of the couples living in a civil marriage, only 5% formalize their relationship. The situation with marriage in Belarus is different. Young people are not too eager to arrange a family life.

Interesting statistics on marriages and divorces in Russia

But if you make the decision to “forgive and forget,” you must be one hundred percent confident that you can do it. There are many techniques that will help you forgive an offense, but the main thing you must understand is that after betrayal, the relationship will definitely change. And not necessarily for the worse: if both the husband and wife found the strength to talk openly and build relationships differently, so that the betrayal does not happen again, the marriage can become even stronger.


Otherwise, the risks of repeated betrayal are very high. Reason 7 Nothing in common In every union there must be a certain common space of marriage: those matters, topics, events that are equally interesting to both. If a husband and wife do not have a single point of contact, if on weekends everyone does their own thing, it is not surprising that sooner or later such a marriage will fall apart like a house of cards.

9 facts about divorce that every couple planning a wedding should know

Civil marriages About half of all couples prefer not to get officially married. Main reasons:

  • Uncertainty about the partner;
  • Lack of housing for young people;
  • Fear of responsibility;
  • Absence of a child;
  • Prejudice. Some couples are confident that after registration their lives will change dramatically.

This trend came to Russia from Europe.

France and Sweden are the world leaders in the number of civil marriages. So, the statistics of divorces in Russia is growing every year. There are more and more unregistered marriages. People have stopped fighting for their relationships and believe there is nothing wrong with divorce.


The ratio of divorced and new marriages in 2014 is 60/40%. There are no exact data for 2015 yet, but the approximate figure is 70/30%. There are plenty of reasons for official breaks in relations.

Statistical table of divorces in Russia in different years

If the spouses manage to cross this Rubicon painlessly, they are no longer afraid of any adversity. Getting married to peers Another study showed that the likelihood of divorce increases in direct proportion to the age difference between spouses. Every year between partners' ages increases the chances of divorce by three percent.

And a ten-year age difference increases the chances of separation by almost 40 percent. Everything seems logical here. Peers seem to be cut from the same cloth. They often share life views and principles with each other and have the same interests.

Why every woman should know her worth Why do cats love to sit in boxes? How a python “dined” with a porcupine and how it ended Don’t have a grandiose celebration As practice shows, the richer and more pompous the wedding celebration, the more likely it is to break the relationship.

Why do people get divorced after 10 years of marriage?

Why do people get divorced after 10 years of marriage, when it would seem that life has improved? After all, separation is always stressful, sometimes a scandal and tears, but something makes married life so unbearable that people run headlong to the registry office and demand an immediate divorce. There are crisis years in a marriage: these are 1 year, 3 years, 5, 7 and 9 years. There are continuous crises and the ninth year is no easier to survive than the first.
What happens to a family when they have lived together for so long, and what reasons could there be for the destruction of the family? Sex. Or rather, its absence. The partners are already somewhat bored with each other and understand that there will be no surprises in bed. And boring and monotonous sex gets boring very quickly.
This can be tolerated for a while, but boredom sometimes makes you look the other way and this brings us to the second reason why a couple gets divorced after many years of marriage.

How to decide to divorce after 10 years of marriage?

RAZVOdis.RU Answers to questions

  • Reasons for divorce in numbers
  • Statistics of marriages and divorces for 15 years in Russia
  • Divorce rate by years of marriage
  • Marriage statistics by age
  • Civil marriages

There may be some differences between the values ​​of marriage in different countries of the world. In Russia, over the past hundred years, the way of life has changed so much that it has led to terrible divorce statistics. Just a few decades ago, destroying a social unit was a moral crime.

Info

Couples who actually separated did not file for divorce. Today there is nothing wrong with the destruction of a family. Therefore, the divorce rate in Russia has been steadily growing over the past three years. Causes of divorce in numbers Social research and psychological surveys are conducted annually on the topic “Causes of divorce.”

Divorce after many years of marriage: 10 most common reasons

At the same time, cooking and cleaning is unnecessary. Let him hire a servant and only give her money for a manicure. This can be tolerated for a while, but when a man doesn’t see any return, or they start blackmailing him with children, that’s the end. By a strong-willed decision, a man breaks off a relationship, and will not soon venture into a new one. A mother-in-law is no better than a mother-in-law, and she can also cause divorce. Even in a happy marriage, if the mother-in-law doesn’t like the daughter-in-law, scandals arise from time to time. Little by little, the mother-in-law turns her son against his wife, and he begins to look at her through the eyes of his mother.

Attention

Of course, then he will come to his senses, but often the family cannot be saved. The insults inflicted on each other are too deep and not everything can be forgiven. Why do people get divorced after 10 years of marriage? The psychology of family relationships is built on stereotypes.


For some, this is the example of their parents, for others, book heroes, or happy families of friends.

Statistics of marriages and divorces over the past 5 years in Russia

Russian divorces Many people mistakenly believe that divorce was rare in the Soviet Union. But that's not true. This is where the highest percentage of divorces occurred. The USSR ranked first among countries in the world. People actually disagreed, but they did not try to advertise this fact officially. After the collapse of the USSR, the CIS emerged. Divorce statistics across countries have increased dramatically. The three leaders were:

  1. Russia – 51%.
  2. Belarus – 45%.
  3. Ukraine – 42%.

Today, Rosstat again confirms that the number of divorce proceedings in Russia is in the lead. Despite the clauses in the law where the couple is given a certain time for reconciliation, 7% withdraw their applications.

Is there life after 10 years of marriage?

The reasons for such situations may be:

  • Keeping the stamp in the passport for the sake of the child;
  • The inability of one spouse to move out;
  • Dependence of the material plane;
  • Disagreement with divorce (most often women);
  • The age of a child is up to 1 year according to the law of the Russian Federation.

Statistics of marriages and divorces for 15 years in Russia Table of divorces in numbers: Year Marriages Divorces % of divorces 2000 897327 627703 70 2001 1001589 763493 76 2002 10019762 853647 84 2003 1091778 798824 73 2004 979667 635825 65 2005 1066366 604942 57 2006 1113562 640837 58 2007 1262500 685910 54 2008 1179007 703412 60 2009 1199446 699430 58 2010 1215066 639321 53 2011 1316011 669376 52 2012 1213598 644101 53 2013 1225501 666971 55 The period from 2000 to 2004 is characterized by the highest percentage of divorces. Approximately 700 out of 1000 couples broke up their families. From 2005 to 2012, the situation improved noticeably.
Do not cheat on your spouse In fact, women who had several sexual partners before marriage do not continue their “adventures” in marriage. This is a myth created by people who do not want to accept the fact that girls no longer retain their virginity until marriage. Representatives of the fair half of humanity can easily settle down by choosing a worthy life partner. Most often they are guided by the saying “one does not seek good from good.” 15 incredible life lessons from your beloved Winnie the Pooh How to understand that you are developing prediabetes: 12 symptoms Lyme disease is caused by ticks and often goes unnoticed However, this does not work for women who, due to some physiological or psychological characteristics, cannot find satisfaction in stable relationships with one partner.

Divorce rate after 10 years of marriage

Sometimes they simply live by inertia, for the sake of the children, for the sake of the apartment, for the sake of a thousand other reasons, and severe stress can force them to divorce. The death of loved ones, serious illness, financial problems, people do not want and cannot sympathize with each other and the gap between them becomes insurmountable. It is important for men to feel like the breadwinner and head of the family; if this is not the case, they feel unhappy. Sometimes they ask for help rather clumsily, but women do not understand their condition and offend them even more. Why do people get divorced after 10 years of marriage? The male view of relationships is specific. Although all men are different, they have the same complaints. Mother-in-law. Mother-in-law destroys marriage and these are not myths or jokes. Through her daughter, the mother-in-law manipulates her son-in-law and “teaches life” to her daughter. Of course, all mothers want their princesses to roll around like cheese in butter, so that their husband carries them in his arms and brings them slippers in his teeth.
Statistics on divorces with children confirm this fact. Every second marriage dissolution occurs shortly after the birth of the baby. But divorce is not the main reason why many children are without a parent.

Over the past 5 years, their number has increased by 30%. The explanation is simple - many women give birth without a husband. Wikipedia will tell you about this view of life in more detail.

If Russian children growing up in single-parent families make up approximately 56%, then in Ukraine it is about 70%. Psychologists have noted that it is more difficult for such students to create a strong family in the future, which leads to an increase in the number of divorces according to statistics. Behavior of spouses after divorce Statistics after divorces noted the following fact - it is more difficult for a divorced woman, regardless of whether she has children or not, to remarry. The reason for such circumstances is the increased mortality of middle-aged men.

It's one thing when you break up after 3 months, and completely different after 10 years. In the first case, in a couple of weeks you will definitely be fine, but in the second, it seems that the whole world has turned upside down, and life will never be the same. We have selected 12 effective life hacks that will help you survive a breakup after a very long period of time.

  1. Let your feelings cool down. Once everything happens, it is difficult to control yourself. You just want to attract attention and receive a portion of comforting advice. But the best way out is to stop and breathe. Don't write angry posts on social networks or call your friends: just give yourself time to cool down. In a fit of hatred and aggression, you can say a lot of unpleasant things for which you will be ashamed.
  2. Make a point. Don't think that after a long relationship you won't have to divide property. You just need one last conversation in which you discuss everything, and try to remain on friendly terms. This will make it much easier for you to get over the breakup. Plus, you can agree on who the pets will move to and how you will divide the “joint property.”
  3. No nostalgia. Here is that very photo in a frame that takes you back to “that happy day”, here is the decoration he gave him, here is “that very song” on the radio. If you don’t stop treating every thing in the house this way, you’ll easily go crazy. Place all the gifts in a box and put them as far away in the closet as possible. An exception may be equipment: but if you wish, get rid of it too.
  4. One day rule. If you still need a day of nostalgia, do not deny yourself it. Take a day off from work, turn off your phones, stock up on handkerchiefs and start your day of saying goodbye to your past relationship. Cry, watch sad films, listen to “your” songs, look at photo albums. But all this is exactly one day. And not a minute more. Then return to point #3.
  5. Let go of your prejudices. Allow something that was not allowed before: for example, some extreme hobby or a banal trip to a nightclub. Now no one will tell you what dress to wear and which of your girlfriends to be friends with or not to be friends with. And now only you make decisions about how to spend your weekend or weeknight. There is nothing wrong with the fact that your boyfriend cared and worried about you, it’s just that now you can enjoy independence.
  6. Have a reset day. Surely by the third week after the breakup, you had brought yourself to the extreme stage of apathy: you don’t want anything, you want to lie down and cry. Take advantage of this mood, but for peaceful and productive purposes. Get up at lunchtime, cook a delicious meal, curl up on the couch with a great book or series of books, and turn your head off. By the evening you will probably lose yourself in the emotions of the heroes and forget about your own.
  7. Write a letter to your ex. Don’t be shy in your expressions, you will never send this letter to him. Write everything: about how bad he is, and about how you miss him, and about what’s in your heart right now. After such psychotherapy, all that remains is to burn the letter, and with it all the feelings that appeared in your soul. Just don’t re-read what you’ve written! Otherwise, the entire therapeutic effect will go down the drain.
  8. Start living. It seems to you that you are the most unhappy person on the planet, but try to look at the situation from a different angle - you now have time that you can devote to yourself and only yourself. For example, go to another city or country for the weekend, rent an apartment or the best hotel and just relax by turning off your phone.
  9. Be free from public opinion. Don't try to track down your ex's new crushes. Believe me, this will not end well for you. And don’t insult him on social networks: be humane. You need to get rid of negativity, not cultivate it. You won’t get any satisfaction from talking “you’re a fool”, but there is a risk of having a nervous breakdown.
  10. Be honest with your loved ones. Tell your loved ones and friends about what happened: it would be better for them to learn the truth from you than to speculate. This is especially true when you have a common company. There is no need to pull anyone over to your side - over time, you will be able to communicate in a common team if you want to. Don't give your friends ultimatums - they are not to blame for your breakup and love you both.
  11. Change your image. Go to a beauty salon and radically change yourself. Do you want to dye your hair blonde? Go for it! Do you want a new fashionable haircut? No problem! Even if you change your mind later, it's just hair that will grow back. Just do what you've wanted for a long time. A new image always gives strength, so such a trip is also a kind of therapy.
  12. Go on a date. Even if it seems to you that all the men around you are just losers, unworthy of paying attention to them. Even if you “only need him.” No one is talking about anything serious, but a little flirting won't hurt you. This will help you believe in yourself and your own attractiveness, which will significantly increase your self-esteem.
  13. Be active. Plan all your free time literally by the hour and minute! A film premiere, an exhibition opening, a street food festival, a trip out of town, a new club or restaurant, shopping with a friend, new acquaintances. You shouldn't have a minute left to just lie on the couch. Spend all your time on hobbies and hobbies. This way, you will get out of prolonged depression much faster - there simply won’t be time for suffering!